Relearn to Like Yourself After CSE
After enduring extreme trauma from a life of commercial sexual exploitation (CSE), it is completely understandable if you no longer like yourself. It's important to acknowledge the impact of that trauma and the challenges it can create on our self-perception. However, it's crucial to remember that healing and self-love are possible, even after such difficult experiences. You have the power to learn how to like yourself again, and maybe even turn that into love.
Not liking who you are can interfere with your overall well-being, self-confidence, and enjoyment of life. This feeling is not uncommon among trauma survivors, but it doesn't mean you have to remain in this space. You deserve to learn how to like yourself and rebuild your sense of self-worth.
Learning to like yourself can increase your self-confidence and help you reach your goals. It can also pave the way for a fulfilling life with meaningful relationships. While the journey towards self-love may not be easy, there are steps you can take to begin the process and foster a more positive relationship with yourself.
1. Take care of yourself
Physical well-being is interconnected with our mental and emotional well-being. Research shows that regular exercise and a healthy diet can improve overall health and happiness. Consider setting a goal of incorporating moderate physical activity into your routine, such as going on walks, practicing yoga, joining a workout class, or going for a bike ride. Taking care of your appearance and dressing in a way that makes you feel comfortable and confident can also contribute to feeling good about yourself.
2. Identify your strengths
During times when you don't like yourself, it's easy to focus on your weaknesses and shortcomings. Shifting your perspective and acknowledging your strengths can help release some of the negativity. Try journaling about the things you like about yourself and what you are good at. Another option is reaching out to a friend and asking them to share their perspective on your strengths. Sometimes, seeing ourselves through someone else's eyes can offer a new perspective and help us appreciate our unique qualities.
3. Express gratitude for who you are
Practicing gratitude can be a powerful tool in learning to appreciate yourself. Take a moment each day to embrace your gifts, abilities, and life itself. Ponder on the small ways you take care of yourself, such as moving your body, feeding yourself, going to work, or engaging in self-care activities. Acknowledge and thank yourself for everything you do. Additionally, it can be helpful to express gratitude for the environment and the people who give meaning to your life.
4. Avoid comparing yourself to others
Comparing yourself to others often leads to self-doubt and dissatisfaction. Remember that everyone's journey is unique, and other people's successes are not a reflection of your worth. Remind yourself that there is room for everyone to thrive and that others' achievements do not diminish your own. Focus on your own growth and celebrate your own accomplishments.
5. Limit social media exposure
Social media can often be a breeding ground for comparison and self-doubt. Understand that what you see on social media is often a curated and edited version of someone's life. Limit your exposure to social media if it starts to negatively impact your self-image. Consider taking breaks and dedicating time to engage with the real world. Connecting with real experiences and genuine connections can help ground you and remind you of what truly matters.
6. Be kind to others
Acts of kindness towards others can have a direct impact on how you feel about yourself. Engaging in acts of kindness can improve your self-confidence and make you feel like a kind and generous person. Recognize the inherent value you bring to the world and how you positively impact the lives of others. Being kind to others can be an important step towards learning to like yourself.
7. Surround yourself with positive people
The company we keep can greatly influence how we perceive ourselves. Spending time with critical and negative individuals can hinder our self-esteem and self-image. Surround yourself with people who support and uplift you. Seek out a friend group that believes in your dreams and offers constructive feedback. Focus on building relationships with people who genuinely want what's best for you, and spend less time with those who make you feel unworthy.
8. Set small and achievable goals
Setting and achieving goals can make you feel accomplished and proud of yourself. Start with small, attainable goals that still challenge you. As you reach each goal, increase the complexity or ambition of the next one. This progression will help you recognize your strengths and develop a sense of self-efficacy. Celebrate each milestone along the way, and let these successes contribute to learning to like yourself.
9. Practice self-compassion
Practicing self-compassion is essential for your well-being and mental health. Be kind to yourself, practice mindfulness, and remember that you are human. Acknowledge that you have been through challenging experiences, but that you are deserving of love, care, and understanding. Seek therapy or counseling to help you develop self-compassion and learn coping mechanisms to alleviate stress and foster positive thinking.
Remember, the journey towards self-love and learning to like yourself after CSE takes time and patience. It's normal to start from a place of neutrality, where you don't dislike yourself but don't yet love yourself either. With each step, each act of self-care, and each act of self-kindness, you are building a foundation for a healthier relationship with yourself. These tips are meant to guide you towards personal growth and self-appreciation. Embrace the process and know that you deserve to heal, love, and like yourself.